The one thing I think we can all agree upon wanting from life is happiness. No matter what else we might all dream of, it’s not really worth it if we aren’t happy. This is why I do my best to surround myself with positivity.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s bloody hard at times. But it has made a big impact on me as a person. I’ve gone from hating the world and everyone in it, to finding the positive in most situations. (There’s something’s that will never have a bright side) And it has served me well.

There was a time I couldn’t see the good. I was so wrapped up in my own darkness that there was no such thing as light. The the worse I felt the more negative I became and the more negative I was the worse I got. It was a vicious cycle I couldn’t escape. Then I decided enough was enough. If I wanted to get better, only I could make that happen. Medication, doctors and phycologists can only take you so far. If you don’t really want it or don’t want to work then your going to be stuck there awhile.

I get it it’s hard to find that place and it takes time. It’s not as some as ‘just being Happy’s. The one thing you can do though is try to see things from another view. You need to work on it but it’s doable. Small steps and you can get there.

Spend less time with negative people. If someone is feeding on your depression and making you feel bad, don’t accept it. Tell them it’s not on or cut them off. It might seem like you are isolating yourself but sticking with the good and positive folk you know and removing the bad you’ll slowly start to feel better in yourself. I have a handful of good friends rather than a tone of pals and my life is richer for having those people how are kind, positive and supportive.

Stop worrying about the little things. Breaking a plate is no big deal (unless your in Jenner’s and it’s one of those stupid £140 plates, then run and hide) spilling water on the carpet is no big deal. It wipes. Burning dinner isn’t a problem (it’s an excuse to order takeout) stop worrying about things in life you can’t control. Accidents happen, accept these things and move on from them.

If things you can control go wrong, then see it as a learning curve. Next time you know to do things differently. Next time you will be more knowledgeable in that area. Allow yourself to make mistakes. It’s part of being human. It’s part of your learning process.

STOP striving for perfection. IT DOESN’T EXIST! There’s no such thing as the perfect anything. Don’t compare yourself, your life, your family, your job or your situations to others. Those people are just being them and you just need to be you. And you are the most perfect you to ever exist. There’s no one in this world that could be a better you than you are! Our lives are all different. We deal with each situation differently. We all have different strengths and good parts. Don’t put yourself down over something that’s just not you.

Stop seeing obstacles as problems instead view them as challenges. Challanges and obstacles can be overcome, there’s always a way to get through or over or around them. Sometimes it just takes a little work.

Be greatful for he good you do have. Okay so we don’t have our own house or expensive luxury items. But I have a roof over my head, a loving family and things I hold dear to me. I might not have abs and a thigh gap, but I have great eyes and a tiny waist. There’s always something to be greatful for. Even if it’s just a good cup of tea.

Learn to leave the past behind you. I know it’s hard. All those things you’ve face that have put you were you are. But those things are still controling you if you don’t let them go. You can’t be happy if you live in last year’s break up or last month’s rejected application. You need to accept it happened, leave it in that moment and move past it. You deserve to be without that heart ache.

See the humour in every situation. I mean it’s hard to laugh when you’ve just lost your bank card and have no cash and it’s the weekend and you needed to do a shop. There’s no funny side to a tough relationship. But looking back don’t get yourself upset over what happened. Laugh at the fact that although you cancelled your card you then found it in the glove box. Find humour in the person you once we’re for being so blinded and not seeing the position you were in sooner. I mean look at you now, present you wouldn’t take that crap so why the hell did past you?

Learn to love yourself. Find one small thing and take it from there. You need to find your own happiness and be comfortable being you. You deserve to be happy. You deserve to be comfortable in your own skin. So teach yourself how to become happy being you.

Find a hobby. Reading, arts and crafts, sewing or cooking. Whatever works for you and the amount of spare time you have. Learn a new skill you will feel amazing when watching yourself accomplish something. I love the feeling of finally finishing a book (it can take forever these days) I love watching family eat the food I’ve made knowing they enjoy it. It makes you feel good when you engage the brain.

Help others. It doesn’t have to be a big thing. Help a friend with a task. Someone move house. Buy a paper for a neighbor. Give snacks to a homeless person. Hold the door for someone. Doing good for others can help you too.

It seems like alot of things to do, but when it comes to your happiness is anything really too much? Small changes can make the biggest impact. And if making a few small tweaks to how you junk can get you out that dark place then it’s really worth a shot.

Love and hugs,

Hayleigh xo

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